This is how most players react to an update.

Players of RuneScape

Whining PKers
Stormy Times
Player Moderators
L33t H4xx0r5
Ranked Members
Elite Levels
Nomad Beaters
High Levels
While Guthix Sleeps Beaters
The Average RuneScape Player
Forum Overlords
Forum Moderators
Forum Ranters
Low Levels
Whining PKers
Merch Clan Scum
Jagex Apologists

Rioters are the result of literally EVERY update Jagex make. (no exceptions) The purpose of the rioters is to cause as much of an unholy shitstorm as physically possible. Let's face it, absolutely bloody nothing could possibly contain the sheer fury that emanates from a normally peaceful fan base. Also Rioters seem to think that they are acctually doing something when rioting in the middle of no where e.g. In the far corner of the wilderness or in the middle of the desert and other uninhabited areas

What causes unholy shitstorms?Edit

Whether it would be something as simple as moving a tree one tile north, or "accidentaly" pushing the whole server list offline, they will strike down like the fist of an angry god, spamming up Falador in 3 different worlds for days on end, unleashing thousands of cannons on the helpless guards, the screams of noobs piercing through the minds of men and Mods, WHERE IS YOUR SARADOMIN NOW!! Sorry, got a little too dramatic there, heh.

Avoid like the plagueEdit

During this time, the forums will be DDoS'ed with a carnage of:

Rants forum after riot

they shot down the freakin Roflcopter!!

"ZOMFGBBQ, why did u take away teh wildy!?!??!?"

"omfg Jagex u suk, hate hate hat"

"BAWWW, u ruined it, I going to play WoW now BAWW"

"R.I.P. runescape"

"-insert ASCII drawing of middle finger here-"

"Now this is a story all about how, Runescape got twistered upside now..."

"the contents of this message have been hidden" (doubleplus goodthink)

"zomg glitch stole my pass"


History of famous riotsEdit

2006 Around the middle of 2006, a lurer by the name of Elvemage, worshipped by many a fanboy, got a perma-mute for telling a member of the thought police to go to hell.(also known as the Sonic/Amy fan group on Deviantart) After this, his fans unleashed the berserker rage on Falador. This was shortly followed by a ban on some harmless world switcher tool called "SoftSwitch", the reason being "it gives an unfair advantage, and was banned for the good of the people" This also resulted in a BAWWWWWWW-fest in Falador.

2007 During both Feburary and June 2007, one of the Jagex staff decided to push the big shiny red button that clearly says "DO NOT PRESS!" and blackout the whole game for about 3 hours. This then followed with Jagex screwing over the pures by reducing the amount of exp they get (with Tzhaar-Mej setting his VCR for the riot, so he could take a cheap shot at them later) the riot lasted for 2 days at the Void Knight outpost, until Jagex told Klaus Nomi to start singing. The scars inflicted in their minds that day will never heal. Later in the year, jagex decided to make like the Grinch and steal christmas, by "ZOMFG TAKIN AWAY T3H WILDY NOES!!!" after putting on a charade about not caring about the bald level 3 yew cutters union. This resulted in, Big Gower abusing his power, Mod Hasbo getting attacked by A.S.B.O.'s, Mod Fran getting flamed by a clan, and yes, I see what you did there... After every single section of the forums got 404'd due to the ungodly level of rage emitting from the sick, twisted serial killers who enjoyed the Wilderness, Jagex decided to promise the players that there will be plenty of quailty updates just like that in the future.

*brick flys through window* Andrew Gower: Ahh, another player who enjoys our game.

2008 Since nothing really happened in 2008, lets do the Time Warp again...

Holy spam

...mother of god...

2009 In Febuary, the letter "µ" became a god, and disconnected every mortal who gazes apon its holy visage. This resulted in several spambots saying "µ" for hours on end in an attempt to glitch-crash every single player in the game. As you can expect, there was BAWWWW, then Jagex closed the Bounty Hunter Crater due to GlitchAIDS, which in turn, caused an infinte loop of rage. After this, Jagex had no choice but to bring back the Rants forum. (which was immedialy taken over by an army of trolls)

In June, just after a "resting update" a player accidently used a pouch to summon Missingno to fight the Chaos Elemental, which caused Glitch-Armageddon to strike down like the fist of the North star. The Bankers went on strike, the monsters went on strike, even the doors in POH's went on strike, it was a revoltion that would make V.Lenin turn over his glass box. Fortually, someone gave the programmers another banana, and the chaos ended. (after 100 players rage quit and 1 Billion gp of rare drops were given away of course)

Squeal of Fortune riot

Fuck my arse dead!